When we were younger, we thought that our 20’s going into our 30’s will be the best years of our life. We often imagined that because we would be earning money while always hanging out with our friends. At least, that was what’s often portrayed by How I Met Your Mother (HIMYM) and FRIENDS.
Suddenly, you realize that it is not what you expected, and you felt lost and anxious about your life and future. You feel disillusioned and discontent about what you thought you’d do after graduating from college and try to find an escape.
If you felt some of these, then you may be experiencing quarter-life crisis. Here are 10 possible signs.
1. You lay down while staring at the ceiling, questioning your life choices so far.
You are unsure whether the choices that you made so far are the right choices for you. You question your educational choice, your job, and even some of your deeply-held beliefs.
You feel lost and don’t know where to go next. It seems that time is moving so fast, but you’re going nowhere.
2. You want to change to a more meaningful career.
You thought you wanted to be an engineer, lawyer, or accountant for most of your life. Suddenly, you don’t feel like it is your true calling when you finally achieved it.
You feel trapped in a profession that is gradually taking all your energy until you have nothing left.
So you just want to find a more meaningful career that will be worth your time, like working for an NGO, teaching, or maybe farming.
All of a sudden, money became not as important as you thought it was. You just want to find joy in doing work that has more societal impact.
3. You’re anxious that your friends are more successful than you.
Whenever you scroll through social media, you often see your friends and schoolmates looking like they are having the best days of their lives.
They have their own car, got promoted in their job, went on a fancy vacation, or got married or had children.
You feel so left out that your life is nowhere as successful as theirs and just tried not to compare your life with theirs.
4. You want an escape from the responsibilities of an adult.
You started living away from your parents for the first time to establish yourself as a full-fledged adult.
However, you never realized how difficult it is to pay the rent, utilities, and subscriptions, perform your familial obligations, and other responsibilities while still hoping that you can travel somewhere lovely like Europe or South America.
The reality is these responsibilities are not going away, so you just dream that you can just crawl back to the safety of your mother’s embrace and take a nap.
5. You feel like you’re a failure because you’re approaching your 30s without any significant accomplishments to show for.
You often think that you should have accomplished many of your goals because Mark Zuckerberg did many things before reaching 30.
However, you realize that you don’t even have the necessary skills to get promoted, the capital to start a business, or the credentials to achieve your dream job.
6. Or you feel like an impostor that you don’t deserve any success that you’re having.
On the other side of the coin, when you achieved relative success in your career, you feel like you don’t deserve them and that others are more qualified than you.
You often think that what you gained is only because of sheer luck, and you are afraid to be found out as a fraud.
7. You’re conflicted about whether to climb the corporate ladder or be a blogger/vlogger who travels the world.
You’re trapped in the rat race, aiming to climb the top of the proverbial corporate ladder. Among your competitors are some of your teammates and also several dozens of your fellow employees.
On some days, you feel very productive and can aim for a yearly promotion.
But on most days, you are thinking that being a blogger or vlogger who travels the world is the life you want to have.
8. You feel disconnected from your peers and family.
You feel that other people won’t understand what you’re currently going through. You can’t get decent advice from older people because they can’t grasp your struggles.
However, you also don’t want to share them with your friends or co-workers because you think they’ll judge you or ignore your situation of feeling lost.
9. Or you’re looking for someone whom you think understands what you’re going through.
There are also times when you just want to find someone to talk to that is willing to listen to all your rants about your stresses, doubts, and insecurities.
You don’t want advice or anything, just an ear that would listen or a shoulder to cry on.
10. You don’t know if you’ll ever be in a serious relationship.
You may have just got out of a long-term or currently in a dead-end relationship, or have never been in one.
You are afraid that time will pass you by, and you will never find the love that you “deserve.”
You’re approaching your 30s or already past that point, so your parents and relatives are starting to pressure you to find a spouse.
Still, you are just overwhelmed by so many things happening in your life, so you decided to just ignore them and have a cup of coffee.
This season is going to be one of the most critical seasons of your life. There will be a lot of changes and challenges, but you need to persevere.
This will be an overwhelming time because you are like a string being pulled by many priorities and responsibilities such as family obligations, personal goals, career goals, looking for your true calling, or looking for a love life.
Just remember that when you feel like your life is falling into pieces, think of it as falling into place.
Through this experience, I hope and pray that you’ll also discover what I discovered, to put God in the center of our life and nothing else, and to trust Him fully that everything will be better.
Now that you finished this, I highly recommend that you also read my other post entitled, “A Life-Changing Journey Through Quarter-Life Crisis.“