Recently updated on: November 18, 2023
It's becoming more apparent that many adults never really reach maturity and are often just cruising through life as kids inside old bodies.
The sad thing about adulthood, which we need to recognize, is that many adults experienced childhood traumas that needed "healing," which may also be why many would do things to compensate for lost youth.
On the other hand, a funny thing about adulthood is that no clear line determines when we finally become adults. Often, we associate maturity with age, but we all know this is not always the case.
Here are some proofs that many adults are kids in old bodies.
Table of Contents
1. Comparing With Each Other
One of the Filipino toxic traits is the unhealthy habit of comparison. So many adults love to compare what they have with others.
For instance, in the office, a more junior employee was promoted ahead of a more senior employee. What happens is that the older would say, "Why was he/she promoted first over me when I was here first? It's unfair!"
Kids often say this, but if you look at many adults, they often pout and shout about unfairness as if the world has been fair throughout.
As adults, we must act better and avoid being too affected when good things happen to others. Instead, we need to clap for their success while working hard to receive ours soon.
Tantrums in children are expected - mainly because they are children, and we can't expect them to be emotionally mature yet.
However, this is a pitiful sight for adults who would have emotional meltdowns and shout their lungs out because things did not go their way.
Just imagine the number of people injured or killed because of road rages that could have been avoided if the matter had been peacefully resolved.
Another adult tantrum is the silent fit, where adults refuse to speak but are visibly angry as they stomp, punch, or close doors forcefully - the same way some kids do it.
As adults, we need to learn to regulate our emotions. It's not healthy to be in your fifties and still throwing fits of rage because someone cut you off or you were not invited to a party.
3. Obsession with Toys
The thing about toys is that many adults never grow out of their obsession with toys. The only difference is that the adult version of toys is bigger and more expensive.
For instance, kids will play with toy cars, but older kids will play with actual cars and even collect them in multiple colors and varying designs. While others would collect shoes and clothes, like dressing dolls and action figures.
Then there are those who never left the toys to children as they forever became accumulators of children's toys and called themselves collectors.
I think adults' obsession with toys is one reason minimalism will never be for everyone. It will take great effort to avoid buying things we don't need.
However, it's a different story if you're an adult playing with toys with your children.
You can't expect children to wait for long because their attention span is short. However, this behavior is still prevalent among adults and older adults.
This is one reason people would cut lines, pay "fixers," and delay saving money. Many adults don't want delayed gratification. They want things instantly. They want things now.
Today, you can't trust many people to wait silently because we've been accustomed to getting things fast. We are in the era of "instants," and it doesn't help children develop patience if all they see are impatient adults.
5. Showing off
Children love showing off. They would show off their new toys, shoes, clothes, games, and more.
Today, those children still love to show off. This time, through social media. People want to show their latest cars, gadgets, new houses, clothes, accomplishments, travel, and more.
The tiny hits of dopamine for every like and reaction every time we post on social media wouldn't also help in avoiding our child-like tendencies to show off.
6. Blaming Everyone But Themselves
Children will blame their playmates, their dogs, the rain, the soil, the door, or anything as long as it can detach them from accountability. Sadly, this is still very observable among adults.
For instance, I know two siblings who grew up in the same family background. On the one hand, one of them accepted that he needed to work hard to improve his and his family's lives.
On the other hand, the other brother still blames his deceased father for what happened to them and how their lifestyle suffered.
It's like the personification of a fixed and growth mindset.
While we can empathize with their plight and suffering, you can't blame others forever. At some point, you must take accountability for your actions and suffer or enjoy its consequences.
7. Asking for Allowances.
Our parents didn't expect us to work when we were young and still studying. So, every day, they would give us allowances as sustenance.
Sadly, some adults never learned to stand on their own as they became adults. This led them to start their own family, remain dependent on their parents, and keep asking for allowance.
I know a few senior citizens who should have retired and relaxed after working for decades but can't because their children and grandchildren depend on them.
This is a terrible state of dependence, which should have been avoided if their "children" learned the value of hard work and independence.
This is why it's sad to notice many parents give everything they can to make their children's lives easy.
Unfortunately, they may be setting their children up for failure because once they go out to the real world, their children may not have developed the resiliency and emotional maturity to stand on their own.
8. They Don't Like Getting Told What To Do
Children don't like getting told what to do. They want things to go their way, which is similar to how some adults never want to hear feedback and advice from others, even if it's for the better.
For instance, I know a retired high-ranking government official who, at that time, was starting his hog farm. So I invited him to a seminar about hog raising. However, he declined and said he didn't need seminars because he already climbed the ranks in his department.
It takes humility to accept our faults and learn that others may know things better than us, which is the purpose of mentors. It also opens our minds to more possibilities and opportunities never available to children.
Growing up is hard because it requires sacrificing our younger selves and starting to think, speak, and act better. Always remember that there are many ways to improve. You just have to be willing.
When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.1 Corinthians 13:11 NIV